Jonathan Torrens – The Briars

The Briars, I hadn’t ever been here before,
But last night I learned about Shelagh’s underwear drawer.
As the evening wore on and people got “moister”,
We sang along with Molly and danced to Prairie Oyster.
I collected all the evidence, mostly circumstantial,
For my financial needs, I use Manulife Financial.
Then the auction, Doug there was no way I could beat cha,
But we raised more dough than they make at Pizza Pizza.
This morning the rain fell hard from above,
If that doesn’t Sound Like Canada, I don’t know what does.
We didn’t have Plan B, there was no contingency,
Co-operators and Great West Life can help at times like these.
100 wet golfers all playing for the chance
To get soaked, have fun and be the “raining” champs.
But along the way, recognizing the cause
Of literacy, you deserve a round of applause.
There were Howards and Mortons and Whitmers and Ferriers
MacLeods and Alexes – hey, the more the merriers!
So let’s all raise a glass to the PGIs a toast,
I delivered these rhymes as fast as Canada Post.
Oh, Max when you get to Gabriola, I’m giving you a chore:
Snoop around and tell us what you find in Shelagh’s drawers.

Jonathan Torrens
June 5, 2007
The Briars